Monthly Recap: What I learned in November 2011

Sunday is quickly drawing to a close and you know what that means... Monday Listicles time again!  This week Stasha has asked us to share our Christmas wish lists.   Well friends, I must already be pretty spoiled because there isn't much I want for myself this Christmas.  So I'm going to go wild and give you a different list.  Because I'm a rebel like that.

And even though I'm breaking the rules (and this wouldn't be the first time, either!), the Grand Master of Lists has done me the great honour of allowing me to select next week's Listicles topic. So, here it is: tell us about your hometown. You can interpret that however you like.

Now, with that little piece of business out of the way, I'll come clean and admit that the real reason this list is off-topic is that I haven't yet done my November recap, and, like any mom, I like to multi-task where I can.  So my listicle this week is ten things I learned in November, inspired by Amber Strocel's monthly learnings.

1.  When you open a new package of contact lenses, it's a very good idea to throw out the old ones, lest you end up with two layers of lenses in your contact case and almost make the mistake of putting them both on your eyeball.

2.  It's pretty awesome when your two-year-old suddenly starts playing by herself for stretches of 10 minutes at a time.  But by the same token, don't expect her to be able to do that on command.

3.  Seeing your little one caring for and smothering her baby dolls with kisses can actually bring tears to your eyes.

4.  A long weekend getaway with good friends who also have a two-year-old can be just what the doctor ordered.

5.  Lilah is now at the perfect age for us to do mini-trips together - like to Vancouver Island to visit my aunt and uncle.  We can share a room without night wakings (though our girl is a rather loud sleeper!), and she adjusts to new situations fairly adeptly.

6.  Chocolate chip cookies inside of brownies a la Bakerella? Yes, please!

7.  Feist gives an incredible live performance.  Seriously, not to be missed.

8. Life with a toddler is highly unpredictable (okay, I already knew this, but I was reminded of it once again this month).  Just when you think you know how yours is going to react to a particular situation, they throw you for a loop.  Lilah sat quietly and perfectly still while having her hair cut.  Who'da thunk it?

9.  Similarly, when you think you know how your child is reacting to meeting Santa, you will be wrong.  The situation can change from minute to minute.  While we waited in line, Lilah was at first excited to meet the big jolly guy.  Then, when we got near the front and watched the children in line in front of us, she totally balked.  As I tried to haul her out of the mall-provided car stroller, she hooked her feet under the front lip of it and loudly cried, "No, I don't wanna!"  Once I calmly explained that Mama would be there the whole time and convinced her to let me get her out, we approached Santa with some trepidation.  But this guy was good, and asked for a high five to break the ice.  Once he explained that if she sat on his lap for a picture, he'd give her a candy cane and a colouring book, she gladly climbed into his lap, and even half-smiled for the picture.

Predictable? Me? Never!

10. I received my blue belt in Brazilian Jiu Jitsu and was reminded of the wonderful feeling of achieving something you have been working towards for a long time.

Learning to Embrace the Quirks

We spend so much time thinking about how and what to teach our children, but it's the rarer occasion when we step back and think about what they can teach us. 

Each stage in Lilah's development has come complete with its own lessons.  From the moment she was conceived, this little being has had so much to teach me.

As she grew inside of me, the lessons were to have faith in what was meant to be and to trust my body.  After experiencing a miscarriage in the first trimester of my first pregnancy just a few month before Lilah was conceived, this lesson was not an easy one, but it was so necessary.

During the newborn stage, I learned (quite abruptly) that it was no longer all about me.  In fact, it was very much not about me.  I learned to give every ounce of myself to another being and to be rewarded simply by the giving, and perhaps the occasional gummy smile.

When she started toddling, I learned to stay near, to keep her safe and protect her from harm, but also that even if I could catch her every time she fell, I probably shouldn't.  I learned that falling down is not only inevitable, but also necessary for us to grow and change.

Now that she is deep in the throes of two, one of the lessons, as I see it, is to embrace the quirks.  A two-year-old, even a shy one like mine, dances like no one is watching, lives in the moment, follows her impulses, says what is on her mind, and lets the quirks shine through, with no concerns about what others might think of her. 

This is a quality I could really stand to absorb.  Since it doesn't seem to happen simply through osmosis, it is a conscious decision I must make to embrace my own quirks.  I used to curse my lop-sided smile whenever I saw a picture of myself.  But now I do my best to squelch that little voice that tries to tell me I look dopey and opt for the loud, uninhibited two-year-old voice that says, "Who cares? I am happy right now."

My lop-sided smile is my authentic smile; the smile that is most connected to my two-year-old, living-in-the-moment, impulse-following, quirky self.  Which makes it far more attractive than anything studied or posed.

And so I choose to receive with open arms the lesson that my tiny one is teaching me and embrace my quirks for what they are: the things that make me human, imperfect, likeable, interesting, and beautiful.

Buzz on over to Bruna's to check out this new meme!

Monthly Recap: What I learned in September 2011

This is part of Amber Strocel's monthly "What I learned" link-up.  Go check it out!

1. I need to look at my Camera+ for iPhone photos before making my "What I learned" list each month.  I forgot to include this in last month's learnings:

(In August I learned that the town of Gravenhurst, Ontario is home to the world's largest Muskoka chair.)

2.  Hand, foot, and mouth disease is an awful, awful virus that affects mainly the toddler and preschool set.  I do not wish it on any family.

3.  It's hard to say goodbye to summer, but fall does have some redeeming qualities.  And I was reminded of even more reasons to enjoy it thanks to some wonderful comments on my post about ushering in the fall.

4.  A nice dinner out with girlfriends who've known me since the dawn of time is like slipping into the perfect pair of jeans: comfortable but flattering, and no need to suck in your gut.

5.  If you leave your leg hanging out around a toddler armed with stickers, it may very well end up looking like this:

6.  I joined my first Twitter #wineparty and it did not disappoint.

7.  We invented a new wrestling game we like to call "sandwich" that involves covering Daddy's back in imaginary condiments and sandwich fixings and then jumping on him.  Daddy's favourite part is being allowed to lie down, and Mommy's favourite part is "eating" the Lilah/Daddy sandwich.  You could say the whole thing is just dripping in awesomesauce.

8.  I burned up a wedding dance floor and realized I still have a few moves left in the ol' repertoire.  Also? The Hubs and I can still clean up pretty nicely.  It feels like more work than it used to, but it's worth it.

9.  I found a new female family doctor (mine moved to Ontario about six months after she delivered Lilah) based on the recommendation of a friend, and so far I am quite pleased.  It is such a relief to once again have consistent, reliable, and friendly care at a practice not far from our home.

10.  Sometimes kid-sized trampolines just mysteriously appear in your courtyard. And when they do, you should take it as a gift and let your kid jump to her heart's content.  And if it holds your weight, might as well give it a few bounces yourself.  Heck, you only live once!

I'm also linking up with Stasha at The Good Life for Monday Listicles because, like me, she loves lists that come in sets of ten and she's such a gracious host that she doesn't even mind that I didn't stick to the prompt!

Monthly Recap: What I learned in June 2011

This is part of Amber Strocel's monthly "What I learned" link-up.  Go check it out!

1. The first thing a child says upon waking up in the morning can be very telling as to their thoughts, fears, worries, and priorities.

2.  Just because it's June, doesn't mean you can just expect summer to appear.  In fact, doing so will set you up for bitter disappointment.  I think this is a lesson I have to re-learn every year in Vancouver.

It's June and we're wearing sweaters and jeans.  What's wrong with this picture?

3.  Everything is a phase. Have I mentioned this one before? I learn it and re-learn it continuously. Lilah is gradually growing out of her fear of dogs and other animals and is getting more comfortable patting, approaching, and/or feeding them. But now she's in this hoarding phase...

4.  Stride bikes are a brilliant invention!

4. Toddlers are unpredictable and lack tact.  Don't be surprised if yours feels the need to comment on your nasal hygiene by pointing at your nostril and yelling, "Ew, booger!" when you are smack dab in the middle of a heartfelt rendition of your favourite bedtime lullaby.

5.  Ninjahood and motherhood actually have a whole lot in common, and the skills learned in one realm easily translate to the other.

6. Two-year molars are not fun.  That is all.

7.  I have incredible neighbours.  From using their washing machine because ours broke down and needed replacing, to swapping clothes, to borrowing ingredients, to enlisting free babysitting for a date night out on the town, our neighbours are so there for us, and we for them, I hope.  We arrived home on Father's Day evening to find a token of appreciation, along with a card for the Hubs from one set of neighbours thanking him for being a positive male role model to their son, since he is growing up with two moms.  To say we were touched would be the understatement of the year!  My words simply cannot do justice to the friendships we have built and the sense of community we have found in the past couple of years.

8. Toddlerhood is all about discovery.

9.  Seeing your parent and your child hitting it off... well, heartwarming doesn't even begin to cover it.

My dad (who we only see a few times a year) and Lilah pause for a snack in front of the dolphin tank at the aquarium.
Photo by  Jon Currie.

10.  Though I am not a native Vancouverite, I have a lot of pride in this great city.  And watching young men and women tear apart the my city - the city in which I have chosen to make my home and raise my child - after the Canucks lost the Stanely Cup finals (fair and square, mind you!) to the Boston Bruins made me feel so many things: disbelief, shame, sadness, horror, disgust, outrage, and fear - for the Hubs, who was there in the arena watching the game.  I am not going to lie, I bawled, both that night and the next day.  This riot was a huge blow to our city, and I took it personally.  I know I am not alone in this sentiment.  It also made me wonder how raise my child to be kind of young person (of which there were many) who would get the hell out of there as soon as things starting going south, or the kind of person (and here, again, there were many) who would show up downtown the next morning to clean up the debris without being asked.  I am fairly confident that I can help shape my child into the kind of person who wouldn't be a leader in all of this, but how do you teach your child not to be the kind of person who gets caught up in the mob mentality and does stupid things just because everyone else is and it seems like fun?  So many lessons, so much food for thought here.  I'm still digesting it all.

Monthly Recap: What I learned in May 2011

This is part of Amber Strocel's "What I learned" monthly link-up.  Go check it out!

1.  I stepped out of my fashion comfort zone and bought a dress that I normally wouldn't give a second thought to.  And when I asked the blogosphere for opinions, I wasn't disappointed - your comments were generous and your suggestions showed how stylish you all are.  I was even treated to a mini footwear fashion show by a real-life friend and came home with two pairs of her shoes to borrow as back-ups!

2.  I started training a speech therapy practicum student and realized how much I actually have learned in the six years since I started my clinical practice.  You never know how much you really know until you start trying to teach someone else from scratch.

3.  I discovered that you can actually learn a few things in Sin City.

4.  I got my first official head shot at VancouverMom's Top 30 Fabulous Mom Bloggers party (I know, I know.  Flogging. Dead horse.  Enough.), where I learned that, though I have always considered myself extremely un-photogenic, the pros can actually make me look kinda good.  But I'm still not planning to ask how much digital enhancement was done on this photo.

5.  15 family members and two dogs in one four bedroom house over a long weekend can totally work!   Especially if you somehow manage to snag the master suite with en suite bathroom and walk-in closet (I promise I didn't go all ninja on anyone to procure this luxury).

6. Your child telling you you look pretty, whether you're wearing a nice dress or the old U2 concert t-shirt you wear to bed, makes you go all swoony and melty inside.

7. Relinquishing control of the camera can lead to some pretty decent shots.  Bonus: I get to be in some of them!  I need to do this more often!

He's not a single dad after all!

8.  I  geeked it up by entering the time-sucking vortex that is Twitter.  I'm still learning how it all works.  Next month I may even be able to tell you what a hash tag is!
9.  I've become one giant ball of cheese.  But with good reason.

10.  When I filled in my time sheet at work, I realized how much overtime I put in this month - no wonder I've been so tired!

What did you learn in May?

The Glass is More Than Half Full

If you've been following along lately, you've probably noticed that my recent posts have been pretty ooey gooey.  Somebody or something abducted my sarcasm and replaced it with pure cheese.  Maybe it's the small doses of Vitamin D the Vancouver weather has finally been granting us, sending me soaring higher than a kite.  Maybe it's just the phase that Lilah is going through.  Or maybe I've lost just lost my sarcasm mojo due to lack of sleep.  Whatever it is, I'm finding myself melting into puddles of schmaltz at any given moment.  It's a little embarrassing, to be truthful.

Just one adorable moment amongst many.

I've heard other moms declare every age the best age, and vow that things just get better and better with each new phase.  I haven't exactly found that to be the case.  If I'm being totally honest, there are phases that I have enjoyed less than others.  But this age?  This age is phenomenal. She tells me I look pretty, she can sometimes play for a few minutes on her own, and she even peed on the potty once(!) to name but a few of the countless highlights. Don't get me wrong, there are still frequent tantrums, and lately there has been lots of purposeful boundary-pushing and outright defiance.  But at the moment, the insanely adorable, melting-puddle-of-schmaltz moments far outweigh the tough ones.

At the same time, when things are this good, I find myself constantly looking over my shoulder, wondering when it's going to catch up with me.  Can things really be this good?  The glass is more than half full.  Watch out, soon it's going to tip over and pour out all over the floor.  But I am doing my best to quiet that voice and just enjoy the beautiful, perfect moments as they come.  Because I know too many people in my real life who are currently dealing with personal tragedies and serious illnesses.  People who are much too young to be facing the issues they are being forced to face.  I have this sense that fully enjoying the amazing little moments life presents me with right now somehow honours these friends of mine.

Happiness is excitement that has found a settling down place. But there is always a little corner that keeps flapping around. ~E.L. Konigsburg

And so I swoon, and wax sentimental, and write corny posts that may cause the more cynical among my readers to vomit in their mouths a little.  It's my prerogative - as a mother, as a blogger, and as a friend to several people who've lately been dealt a crap hand and are still managing to make the most of their cards.  Call it a tribute, call it a reality check, call it not whining because others are dealing with real problems, call it what you will.  I call it sipping from an overflowing glass.

Life is sweet.  Have some more cake.

(Oh, and for those of you who might be concerned that I'm becoming totally spoiled, don't worry.  I wrote most of this post before I came down from the high of another amazing weekend full of birthday parties, unexpected sleep-ins, outdoor activity, and good friends.  And then Monday hit, and I was my usual Monday self - tired, a little stressed out at work, and mildly cranky.  Lilah had a brief tantrum after I picked her up from daycare, and then I arrived home to cat puke in my hallway.  So all in all, a typical Monday, tipping the scales a tiny bit towards the mediocre.)

One joy scatters a thousand griefs~ Chinese proverb

January 2011 Recap

Amber Strocel does a monthly recap and has invited others to play along and link up. So here's what I learned in January:

1.  Creating a slideshow on Windows Movie Maker is a whole lot easier than I expected.  And I really enjoy the process.  I'm already looking for an excuse to whip up another one!

2.  There's nothing like a friend visiing from out-of-town (out-of-country, actually) to get a whole bunch of old friends all in the same room.

3.  Credit card roulette is a dangerous little game, especially when the the bill is for dinner for ten people at a decent restaurant.

4.  I'm usually behind the camera, so occasionally a self-portrait is in order.

5.  Baby putting babies to bed: funny stuff.

6.  No Glee for an entire month can lead to serious withdrawls.

7.  Baby's first haircut doesn't have to be a huge ordeal.  And as a bonus, I have rediscovered the little divet at the nap of her neck - the sweetest, softest, most perfectly kissable little divet in the history of divets.

8.  Every parent should have a healthy supply of stickers on hand at all times. 

9.  There is nothing more thrilling and more hilarious than your child's first attempts at saying new words.

10.  Apparently, my New Year's Resolutions are no match for Procrastination, Excuses, Job Stress, and Gluttony.  Not to worry, February will be my month!

What I Learned in December 2010

Amber Strocel does a monthly recap and has invited others to play along and link up. So here's what I learned in December:


1. Toddlerhood is like a roller coaster ride.  There's a whole lot of screaming, sudden ups and downs, and it's both thrilling and exhausting at the same time.

2.  A twenty-four hour stomach bug can last over two weeks for a wee one.  And that means a lot of time off work (which will have to be made up at some point), a lot of TV, and a lot of laundry.  Oh, and laminate floors are an asset when dealing with a vomitous toddler.

My sickie baby

3. Getting interested in photography has helped me notice the beauty all around me. 

4. Killing time between a morning car nap and a birthday party can lead to an unexpectedly beautiful discovery.

5. Watching everything you've ever learned about language acquisition (which is actually quite a lot, when you've done a Master's Degree in speech-language pathology) played out in your own child is absolutely fascinating.

6.  Watching your daughter play with her grandfather is an incredibly heart-warming sight.  Especially when she used to shake uncontrollably and cry with fear when he came anywhere near her.  Three cheers for progress!

7.  My super mama sense of smell is almost, but not quite, infallible.  It is possible for the occasional poo-poo to sneak by me.  (Mwahaha, dare you clink the poo-poo link?)

8.  Furry hamster toys that move and dollies that crawl freak Lilah right out.  Like, shuddering with fear and clinging to Mommy's leg freak her out.  To the point that it takes removing the toy from sight and several minutes of special cuddles to calm her down.

9.  Christmas makes so much more sense when you have a child.  More to do, mostdefinitely, more stressful, probably, but also so much more magical.  And the stress and the busy-ness all become totally worth it for the sound of toddler squeals of excitement on Christmas morning.  So worth it.

10.  A quiet New Year's Eve games night can get rowdy rather quickly when there's alcohol involved.

This is about all I remember from our "quiet" games night on New Year's Eve.
And it's that blurry in my memory too.