How do you teach her to treat others with kindness while still respecting her personal boundaries?
How do you show her what it means to be polite while acknowledging her natural tendency towards shyness?
How do you encourage her to try new things when she is the type of child who avoids risk and takes time to warm up?
How do you teach her to stand up for herself and yet not retaliate when another child hurts her or takes something from her?
How do you teach her to use her words, but not to be a tattle-tale?
How do you avoid putting pressure on her so she can do things in her own time?
How do you teach her to be wary of strangers without being rude?
How do you make sure she can defend herself, but only when truly necessary?
How do you raise her to be confident in who she is and yet open to learning, growth, and change?
How do you?
Naturally I have no answers because Theo is the polar opposite, which brings up a whole OTHER list (with some similarlites) of issues! Interestingly, I was a little like Lilah when I was a little. I was so sensitive and shy I still remember people being critical or hard with me. But anyway, lovely post. I have absolute confidence that you are doing all the right things!
ReplyDeleteThis is so sweet. I have a little girl and I wonder the same, often. The fact that you're asking and thinking about those topics, means that you're already doing really great. Lucky lil' Lilahbility.
ReplyDeleteWith a lot of patience and encouragement - and no, it's never easy ;)
ReplyDelete(visiting from ippp)
I ask myself these questions on a daily basis. It isn't easy.
ReplyDeleteI think the main thing is your are asking the right questions. No one has ever been the perfect parent but we can all be the best parent we think our particular child needs. Things that work for one child in the family -- may not be the best way to handle if for another. And I agree with Kerstin. Patience. (and that may be the hardest thing.) But it has gotten easier the older I get.
ReplyDeleteI just love what southmainmuse said up there. No answers really from me, but the questions you're asking are so telling that you already have such a great connection with your kiddos. It's so tough sometimes, I know. Buddy, do I.
ReplyDeleteYou're already doing it, Amanda.
ReplyDeleteSo hard, isn't it? We can only try our best.
ReplyDeleteI am a mom of 3 boys. Each with a unique personality and what worked for one never worked for another.. it is hard to do it all isn't it. I really don't have a clue other than go with your child's flow..and baby steps.
ReplyDeleteThose are all good questions. And I'm sure most of us would like the perfect answer to. That dress is too adorable!!!
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure I have any answers, but I feel the best way is to model the behavior you want your child to have.
ReplyDeleteShe sure is adorable!
Oh, I wish I knew. I think that's the hardest part of being a parent...knowing how to make sure they grow up having learned these things.
ReplyDeleteI loved this! I stopped by from Shell's place. Parenting is so hard. I wish I had the answers too.
ReplyDeleteMeh. Relax. If she doesn't have scurvy, boken bones, and isn't bleeding on the carpet then you're doing ok!
ReplyDeletePretty picture. And I don't know what the answers are either... but I trek on. And on. And on.
ReplyDeleteThat is the million dollar question. I'm finding my girls are SO much harder to raise than my boys...so I'm right there with you.
ReplyDeletexo
I have NO clue! I'm hoping my baby girl teaches me along the way on the right way to teach her...
ReplyDeleteOh, if any of us could figure this all out, we'd sell the book for millions! All important questions - all great to think about. Thanks for the afternoon reflection (and what a lovely picture!!)
ReplyDeleteLet me know when you figure it out! (Although I'm under the impression that I got really lucky having boys because girls seem HARD.)
ReplyDeleteYour daughter and mine are very much alike. I wrestle so much with these questions. It's a little tricky raising girls, isn't it?
ReplyDeleteIn some ways Sarah is like that and in some ways she has changed a little. She never used to stand up for herself and basically hand over whatever item a child was trying to take from her. Now she is getting better at saying no.
ReplyDeleteI find letting my kids do stuff in their own time is very hard for me. I am working on it.
Lisa